am i just a jealous person?

[soulfulempress]

Lol.... I just dont think its neccesarry to label someone's behavior...as childish...because they may find it offensive. However Im not Lady Jai so I can not speak for her. But I do feel there is a way to offer your opinion without coming off as rude or judgemental......

[Samoon]

"about a month ago he was bugging me about me seeing other guys and now he's associating with her as if i'm not in the picture."

I'm sorry, but the above is what I noted--first. Although I agree with others here that you two should communicate futher on this, "gut intuition" is something else--if one chooses to igg it altogether.

You state that over the course of the last seven months that you two have SLOWLY been developing, "a relationship." Was a committment to the relationship expressed...ever? And now you state that the brotha, as of a month ago, is "buggin" inasmuch as encouraging you to see/date others? What changed? Perhaps the brotha really WAS caught in the cut of, "people come into our lives for a reason, a season or a life-time." Ultimately, you may have to decide which applies to both of you.

He's suspect at best. But if you want to honestly continuing in developing your could be now (?) friendship, you'll do what you feel is in your best interest. Talk to the man and BOTH of you make a decision that you both can agree upon on. If you feel that you are "emotional" at this time"--take a step back for a minute and regroup. And let him be aware that you need to find a comfort zone for this. If he has been the sincere friend that he has been for the past several months, he will be understanding of your feelings.

Good luck and I sincerely hope that things work out for both of you.

[soulfulempress]

Originally Posted by Samoon

"about a month ago he was bugging me about me seeing other guys and now he's associating with her as if i'm not in the picture."

I'm sorry, but the above is what I noted--first. Although I agree with others here that you two should communicate futher on this, "gut intuition" is something else--if one chooses to igg it altogether.

You state that over the course of the last seven months that you two have SLOWLY been developing, "a relationship." Was a committment to the relationship expressed...ever? And now you state that the brotha, as of a month ago, is "buggin" inasmuch as encouraging you to see/date others? What changed? Perhaps the brotha really WAS caught in the cut of, "people come into our lives for a reason, a season or a life-time." Ultimately, you may have to decide which applies to both of you.

He's suspect at best. But if you want to honestly continuing in developing your could be now (?) friendship, you'll do what you feel is in your best interest. Talk to the man and BOTH of you make a decision that you both can agree upon on. If you feel that you are "emotional" at this time"--take a step back for a minute and regroup. And let him be aware that you need to find a comfort zone for this. If he has been the sincere friend that he has been for the past several months, he will be understanding of your feelings.

Good luck and I sincerely hope that things work out for both of you.

Very thorough and well thought out advice Samoon...Kudos!

[Corals]

Originally Posted by soulfulempress

Lol.... I just dont think its neccesarry to label someone's behavior...as childish...because they may find it offensive. However Im not Lady Jai so I can not speak for her. But I do feel there is a way to offer your opinion without coming off as rude or judgemental......

You're not? I was beginning to think you were. I've told you this before. If a poster asks for an opinion, then they should be able to accept whatever opinion is given.

Judgemental? Didn't Lady Jai asked for an opinion? Opinions are made on facts or evidence that are provided. Mine was based on what was provided.

Now how is me saying that someone's behaviour is childish being rude?

Soulfulempress, it would appear that regardless of what I say, you would take a dig.

I don't want to get into a fighting battle with you, because that seems to be the route you are heading down.

[soulfulempress]

It is not my intention to get into a fighting battle with anyone on this board. I dont have time for that...and its not worth it anyway. Maybe I am just a little too sensitive, but like I said I wouldnt appreciate an opinion from anyone if they felt the need to label me and my behaviors. In the end...this is Lady Jai's issue and she can take everyone's opinions how she sees fit....Now we can get back to the topic at hand.....

[robbboy2003]

Originally Posted by soulfulempress
Lol.... I just dont think its neccesarry to label someone's behavior...as childish...because they may find it offensive. However Im not Lady Jai so I can not speak for her. But I do feel there is a way to offer your opinion without coming off as rude or judgemental......



You're not? I was beginning to think you were. I've told you this before. If a poster asks for an opinion, then they should be able to accept whatever opinion is given.

Judgemental? Didn't Lady Jai asked for an opinion? Opinions are made on facts or evidence that are provided. Mine was based on what was provided.

Now how is me saying that someone's behaviour is childish being rude?

Soulfulempress, it would appear that regardless of what I say, you would take a dig.

I don't want to get into a fighting battle with you, because that seems to be the route you are heading down.
__________________
"Oh baby when you talk like that, you make a woman go mad" 'It's hard being QUEEN of the entire universe' I think you and some of the other posters have given the woman some great advise.


Now, let brotha robbboy be the first to tell each of you fine sista's to come over to the positivity thread,and tell us how sister Corals and Soulfulempress,became intercontinental pen sista's

Brotha Robb luvs ya, if you haven't been told that lately! :)

[The Dragon]

I once talked to a guy who did not want me associating with men regardless the reason. A guy friend was totally out of the question but at the same time he would periodically talk with the girl down the street and would even walk a bit with her.

When I brought this to his attention he would accuse me of being "jealous" and declare that they were homies, but at the same time if I even looked at a man for a minute longer then 2 seconds there would be some **** in the game. Whats up with that? He can have "friends" but I shouldn't even be talkin to a man; He would get jealous about my own cousins and me socializing!!

Good to say that was a very, very short involvement.

Yea, I agree with the rest and say definitely have that talk. Then let him know you will be have males associates whom you only talk to occasionally and he shouldn't mind since you can accept his females friends.

Brutha rob I don't think the 2 Sistah's heard you. You grab one n' I'll grab the other, toss 'em into that positivity thread of yours. Matter of fact I should prob. take a trip there myself..

Anyway, I pretty much agree with the simplest n' first piece of advice that was given; talk to 'em (aint my baby brilliant :)). N' I'll tell you from experience; y'all's lil' gut intuition is there for a reason, probably b/c God knew what typa creatures he was creating (being one himself) n' figured that's how he'd even the playing field. But don't let that yit get yourself into trouble, you could ruin something very special talkin' 'bout some damn gut intuition. Just keep it in the back o' ya head, it aint yit w/o evidence. Do not trip or flip out (we hate that), as Sis. Samoon said it doesn't really sound like the two of ya were actually "together" in the first place so there's absolutely no room for irrational behavior, when he's not even officially yours. Best of luck to ya.

[poeticasylum1]

[quote=Lady_Jai]Right now my emotions are all over the place. I've been developing, slowly, a relationship with this one guy for about 7 months. We live about 30 mins away from eachother

30 minutes away? Hell. it takes 30 minutes to get to most places in houston. I know this isnt a long distance relationship and communication is all a relationship is worth, its a better pillar than trust as far as im concerned. just my 2 cents.