Tired Of All These Big Chicks!!!!!!

[terrence]

As one that has very real concerns about the states of health in our black communities, the REAL message needs to bared out

Samoon, I agree with you. IMO the healthcare disparity among Black people is alarming, but who is to blame? I know that there is a degree of personal responsibility, BUT OUR healthcare needs are constantly overlooked like we do not exist. When we have unaddressed health issues that take away our ability to live long healthy lives, and reproduce the white man gets what he wants. What can be done about this?

I admit that I love big women, and I am married to a BBBW. Recognizing that our health is important we both have taken steps to improve our health. In a way I appreciate what Monique is doing because I am so tired of seeing flat women on TV and having society dictate what is attractive.

[love2talk]

Then there are those who have glandular problems and then genetics can contribute too. Every woman (or person, for that matter) isn't big because they sit down all day eating themselves that way. I agree to an extent that there is a more attractive way for larger women to dress to complement their weight, but there's plenty of small/thick girls that dress inappropriately too. No one really gives them much hell for looking skankish, now do they? It doesn't matter if it does look better on them or not, it's still distasteful to come out in public with a skirt short enough to see your thong sitting down, and a braless tube top with the "girls" poking through.

[urfan2c]

Originally Posted by Afro Saxon

Where was there anything disrespectful uttered?

I did not respond to you and was speaking in general...

[Corals]

Originally Posted by blacktruth34

I just moved to upstate NY and man listen it's hard to find a descent chick here who's not overweight .

If you are having problems finding 'a decent black chick.......who is not overweight', then maybe you moved to the wrong city and should consider moving again!!

As Ufan2c stated, people are overweight for many reasons, some being of a medical nature, and there are those who have always been of a larger size.

Having a big belly in no way constitutes being obese of overweight, many people has a big belly because of the amount of fluids (beer) with consume or maybe they have fibroids which increase the size of the belly. I've never heard of anyone dying of a big belly.

I think people sometimes take the word obese and run away with it. Just because a person may have a few extra pounds on their body, again, that does not constitutes obesity.

[MrAtlanta]

Obesity is caused by a serious biological dysfunction. Once you figure this out, then you're probably better equipped to deal with this problem. Seeing a good Doctor is the best way to go.

Since I choose to look at this from a health perspective, I don't think we should castigate other human beings for their problems with weight. This, to me, does nothing to help the person or persons in need. However, I do get angry when I hear overweight women say stupid stuff like, "well, it's just more of me to love" or, "I'm able to keep my man warm at night".

I also get angry when some overweight women try to glamorize obesity like Monique has done over and over again. I think it's fundamentally wrong to tell other overweight women that it's alright to be fat. If Monique really wants to be a role model for other overweight sistahs, try leading by example and at least try to lose some weight. Just don't tell people that obesity is alright if you can "wear it well".

Buying healthier foods might cost a little more, but it doesn't cost you anything to get your *** out there and exercise.

[Samoon]

@ Mr. Atlanta. I agree. About a year ago? On this very same site? I spoke of a colleague, a sista-friend that was 350-400 lbs overweight. Whenever and wherever she walked, people would do double-takes, stare, and she was the brunt of all of the "fat" jokes. And it really hurt ME because I knew that deep down inside that the sista was really, really unhappy...and hurting. There are some pretty ignorant and vile people out there that feel good to put someone in her state down to build themselves up. So myself and three others just took it upon ourselves to just support her and the first line of support? Believe it or not? "Therapy." Now most people would shy away from seeking counseling, but for her? It worked and has continued to work. So it began with talks...I gained her confidence and she went from there. I was honest with her though. I told her that unless she stuck to a very rigid regimen, that it would take her at least a little over 2-3 years to take the weight off safely, albeit absence of any "invasive procedures," e.g. wiring her mouth, etc. In addition, yep, she had/has other underlying problems such as back pain (she had super, super, super, dupa breasts, an XXL stomach (and as Corals stated about Fibroids, yes, she had Fibroids, common in Black women and I'm not criticizing her, I'm applauding her for her efforts in how FAR she has now come), high blood pressure (and she was taking what is commonly known as "water pills," erroneously thinking that shedding water-weight was losing weight, but she is now clear on this misnomer) and was not able to walk far without having to "rest for a minute." She does not smoke, so that was a plus. She nearing the "mid-way" weight loss scale now...and still going. The plateaus have been many, but she knows that her weight will begin to drop again. It was not an easy battle for her...it still isn't. But the focus was on facing her inner demons, CHANGING her eating habits, adopting an exercise program that she would remain committed to and the BIG one: changing the method in which many of us as Black people cook our food.

If a male/female is comftable with their size, more power to you. But please try to remain conscious of BEING healthy. It's bad enough that so much of our food in this society is freeze-dried, MSG'd to death, etc. I'm sure that for some, with time management, it may be difficult balancing families, careers/jobs, etc. But hey? Don't get YOU lost in the shuffle. Take some time out for you. And that includes some form of exercising. Live long --and thrive. :)

[DBlack]

First, I want to commend everyone in this thread for turing what started as an ignorant attack on overweight people into a thoughtful, intelligent discussion.

Beauty comes in all shapes, sizes and color. We all have our preferences, and slandering others because they don't measure up to our personal tastes for beauty is just plain ignorant.

Mr. Atlanta, tha'ts not entirely true. Obesity can also be caused by unhealthy eating habits and an inactive lifestyle.

As a computer geek, many of my colleagues have the huge belly. Why, because we are not that active at work.

Trying to pass obesity off as an inherently biological condition is misinformative and encourages people to adopt a lazy defeatist attitude toward obesity.

Most people can beat obesity by getting off of their arses and working out a few times a weak for 20 minutes and cutting down on overly fatting foods. It doesn't take some extreme fitness/diet regime to avoide uberfatness.

I'm a living example; 6.1, 230lbs. When I abandon my fitness regime, I can get up to 250 in a month.

[Celeste]

Originally Posted by blacktruth34

I Kmow i'm probabley gonna catch hell for this one but let's be clear about this . The obesity thing is really out of control and it needs to be told . I don't reall have a problem with big chicks but where i live it seems like that's all there is. I just moved to upstate NY and man listen it's hard to find a descent chick here who's not overweight . I mean they try to hard to look good and they really look at hot *** mess trying to fit all that stuff into some tight jeans or a belly shirt . Hello, you cant wear a belly shirt if you got rolls of stomach stickin out ,that's nasty!!!!!!!!!!Then they got the nerve to think it's all about them . Ibelieve alot of women these days don't know how to dress it up meaning even if they are big it's a comfortable way of dressing without showin all that which nobody wants to see .Again i'm not bashing the big girls but damn get it under control ,you can be a big girl and still be attractive pending on how you carry that weight,i've seen some pretty big girls but it's just not for me i guess . fellas speak out ,women can too !!!

Hmmm...it appears that discriminating against heavy people is one of the last "acceptable" forms of bigotry...please remember that obesity is a disease-process (physical, psychological or both). A DISEASE-PROCESS.
People SUFFER from obesity, and most do not "enjoy" being heavy(there are exceptions, of course) or appreciate being insulted and humiliated by others because of it. And as far as proper attire is concerned, I've seen PLENTY of skinny folk decked-out like maniacs---some cannot dress to save their lives.
It's important for us to have compassion...to increase awareness of and access to comprehensive healthcare for obese people. There are heavy folk---in my family and in public life---whom I love and admire very much. I don't "blame" them for their weight problems any more than I would "blame" them if they had cancer or M.S., etc.
There should be ZERO shame attached to obesity. I'm far more concerned with the "disease" of racism and intolerance in this country.

Originally Posted by DBlack

I'm fat az hell. If you don't like it, don't look my way....

I'd look your way and give you my best smile, DBlack. In fact every thin person should try smiling at a heavy person once in a while---let them know you see their humanity, not just their size. I'm a slender Sister, but all sizes are beautiful to me. It's all about the soul.

Originally Posted by Samoon

If a male/female is comftable with their size, more power to you. But please try to remain conscious of BEING healthy.

That's basically the way I look at it Samoon. If you like it, I love it. But a complete disregard for one's health isn't good, whatever the manner. As far as dress goes, I don't know why some people seem to be taken aback so much by some big ladies' choice of clothing. The fact is that there are some people who are more fashion conscious (like myself:)) and others who are into fashion don'ts. I don't think the big girls have a monopoly on that, as Love2talk pointed out. Being sexy is a state of mind and all people, no matter the body type, can be sexy. I have big girls in my family, where I grew up, even big girl friends. Beautiful women, inside and out. Of course some are more health conscious than others. You can't look at one big girl, or man for that matter, and tell which ones are trying to lose weight or get healthier unless you know them personally. Besides, it's a hella lot of skinny folks who could use a day of all you can eat at Popeye's or something. When are we gonna start talking about them???

[shankems2000]

Hmm, I gotta agree with the original poster on this one. These women walking around with their bellies flopping out from under a tight shirt that they "think" they look cute in, it's, well just unsavoury. Don't get me wrong, I've seen some beautiful bigger women, but for the most part it seems as though they're on this I'm fat, I'm proud and there's nothing wrong with it thing that doesn't make any sense to me. I mean why try to fit into something that small? Do they (those that dress that way) think it's sexy or attractive? I mean do they honestly believe that it's attractive in any way? And besides the look, there are health problems that come along with being overweight like that, respiratory problems, heart problems, etc. I mean, I know that at least some of them have to be unhappy with being overweight and do nothing, when all they need to do is eat better and excercise. As a matter of fact, just reducing your salt intake will drop pounds, but I guess some people are happy like that, and if they are well that's good for them, but don't complain when you get stared at.