Assumptions

[ibecece]

Originally Posted by MzKwietStorm

Every since high school, I was seen as a geek or a nerd. So in college I decided to get a tongue piercing just so people could see me differently and of course, because I had the piercing everyone ASSUMED that I gave oral sex because I had it. That's the only assumption that I know of, that's been made about me.

Oh yes I can identify with this one. I had a tongue ring that me and a friend went and got one night, just out of boredom. More men and women hit on me than a lil' bit. Then it took the cake when my grandma's neighbor who was too old and not my friend asked me how my boyfriend liked my tongue ring and winked. I immediately knew what she was assuming and the only reason why I didn't give her every piece of my mind I could spare was because my grandma was on the porch and she would have knocked me three minutes from the next week if i would have gotten smart with that lady, but I rolled my eyes hard enough that they should have rolled out of the socket and went in the house. First of all, her old *** should have known better than to ask me anything like that in front of my grandma and second of all we are not even on the same level(another assumption), we were not friend for her to even question me about any man I had or what i did to him. As you can see i am upset about that situation, just thinking about it makes me want to slap her, but like an idiot i took it out because I was soooooo tired of people asking me what i did freaky with my tongue ring.

[Celeste]

Originally Posted by The Dragon

That I'm stuck up just because I stay to myself. It takes me awhile to get comfortable with someone so I keep a safe distance until I feel it is safe to open up. But I am deffinitely not "stuck up."

You're wise to keep a safe distance, Dragon...people can be STRANGE.
People assume I'm stuck up---and I can be (I'll admit it), but only when it comes to bigotry and dismal manners on the part of other folk...I have very little tolerance for that kind of nonsense. People also assume I'm a social butterfly, but I'm secretly a shy, sensitive geek who could use a hug and a fresh-baked cookie. White people assume I'll agree with everything they say just because I tend to talk like a prep-school princess(obnoxious, I know, but it's a by-product of the all-Ivy trip...can't help it sometimes). I get a kick out of yanking them straight by quoting El Hajj Malik or Stokely or Angela or Garvey out of the blue--- LOVE to watch 'em squirm. :whistling . I often make the mistake of assuming most people are normal and decent at heart. Reality is: most people are completely dented. What a world, what a world.

Originally Posted by Sumyr

The only one that really bothers me is that most guys automatically assume that I am "high maintenance" or that their money will win their way to my heart.

Most guys I meet tell me that I could get their whole paycheck or that they would give me the world.

I hear this all the time. And men have offered to give me the sun, moon & stars---the whole nine. Such silliness. Little do they know how "low-maintenance" I really am---I came from the bottom---struggled and STUDIED my way to the middle and am on my way upward (with grace, may it become so).

[ibecece]

I am tired of people white and those supposedly intelligent black people thinking because I speak slang that I am ignorant. I have saw the topic posted everywhere about people who speak proper english tired of other assuming they are too "white." I am guilty of this at times and i apologize and try to correct my thinking when i do that because I am capable of speaking correct English and I don't like the "supposedly" intelligent people thinking that I am ignorant for speaking slang.

[Celeste]

Originally Posted by ibecece

I am tired of people white and those supposedly intelligent black people thinking because I speak slang that I am ignorant. I have saw the topic posted everywhere about people who speak proper english tired of other assuming they are too "white." I am guilty of this at times and i apologize and try to correct my thinking when i do that because I am capable of speaking correct English and I don't like the "supposedly" intelligent people thinking that I am ignorant for speaking slang.

You know what, Sister? I hear you...I've never felt "slang" (or "soul" as I was taught to call it)made anyone sound ignorant. It is the natural and welcome sound I hear when I am in community with my family or in a gathering of our People. Soul is what I want to hear when I'm just WITH my group, digging the day. It's what I miss when I'm surrounded by White folk and am in my "prep" mode. But "proper"/"standard"/White English comes naturally to most of us when we want/need it to.
It bothers me that you feel the need to apologize. Embrace the speech you feel most at home with. Don't justify it to White people or anybody else. "Slang" is just as legitimate, history-based and "correct" as standard English. I use both, but my heart is filled with only one.

BTW: I'm jealous that you know how to crochet---I never could get it right!

That whole speech issue is a trip. I too am most comfortable with slang and around others who use it, though I am fluent in so called "proper" English cuz I know in the business world appearances make a difference. But some of the most intelligent people I know talk with a lot of slang so the correlation is .

[dyme@alltymes]

Im tired of folks saying you cute to be darkskin,excusssssssssssse me,why you assuming all darskinned women are not cute? SMDH!!

Some people don't even realize how dumb they come across when they say stupid ish like that Dyme.

[Proudbrothaman]

Dime I get the same treatment

[love2talk]

I could understand a comment like that coming from some different race of people considering how whitewashed our society is, but more than half the time, it comes from another sister/brother who should be more than familiar enough with that kind of treatment. I don't think you can get much sadder than that.