No Call backs - Page 2 - AfroChat - African American

Moe17 · July 13th, 2008, 09:33 AM

Well, its best he didnt call...then he calls, you two have a great convo over the phone (at lease you think), he says how you & him talk longer than his ex has ever spoken over the phone. Then, the next day...he acts brand new.

Okay, ok, venting....

darkwing69 · July 13th, 2008, 09:40 AM

I have to admit i didnt call this one sister that i took out back but my intentions were good. We actually had a great date, i enjoyed the conversation and all she was very intelligent and she was really sweet and i am sure someone would be blessed to have her. Actually things went so well i didnt have the heart to tell her she just physically did not do it for me. so instead of calling her to tell her i didnt want another date, and have her ask me why, and i have to hurt her feelings and make her feel like a troll or something. I chose to let her be pissed at me and blame me for not calling... trying to spare her heart

Moe17 · July 13th, 2008, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by darkwing69

I have to admit i didnt call this one sister that i took out back but my intentions were good. We actually had a great date, i enjoyed the conversation and all she was very intelligent and she was really sweet and i am sure someone would be blessed to have her. Actually things went so well i didnt have the heart to tell her she just physically did not do it for me. so instead of calling her to tell her i didnt want another date, and have her ask me why, and i have to hurt her feelings and make her feel like a troll or something. I chose to let her be pissed at me and blame me for not calling... trying to spare her heart

Can I ask you something; was it a blind date? I just thought it was odd that you'd even consider taking her out....
I was courting one guy, who I thought was so ugly when I first saw him (lol). Once I got to know him, I just could not keep away from him. I need to stop forgetting that the guys are only after one thing my age.

darkwing69 · July 13th, 2008, 09:57 AM

no it wasnt blind so to speak but i did meet her on the internet, and we all know internet pictures and how they can be. it wasnt that i am there just for the physical but no, not this one she couldnt grow on me over time it wasnt there.

Voluptuous Miss · July 30th, 2008, 05:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by soulfulempress

This question is aimed towards the brothers although I'm sure some men have gone through this as well.....

Whats up with the no call backs?!?!?! It is really infuriating for me....but the last few dates I have went on the guy just goes MIA...what is up with that... I mean you cant be man enough to tell me you are not interested instead you just dont answer your phone??? I mean it has left me feeling like I have done something wrong and I am left with questions that go unanswered..have any guys done this and if so....WHY???

Usually men don't call back because they aren't interested. Maybe you weren't enough of a challenge to him. Maybe he didn't feel that "vibe" and he didn't want to waste his and your time. Maybe he was intimidated by your accomplishments. Maybe he was looking for "miss right now" and not "miss right". Who knows why they do what they do. But when it used to happen to me I would ask myself, "why didn't he just tell me what the problem is from the door?"

darkshadow4563 · July 30th, 2008, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by darkwing69

I have to admit i didnt call this one sister that i took out back but my intentions were good. We actually had a great date, i enjoyed the conversation and all she was very intelligent and she was really sweet and i am sure someone would be blessed to have her. Actually things went so well i didnt have the heart to tell her she just physically did not do it for me. so instead of calling her to tell her i didnt want another date, and have her ask me why, and i have to hurt her feelings and make her feel like a troll or something. I chose to let her be pissed at me and blame me for not calling... trying to spare her heart

You didn't spare her heart. You left her wondering. It would have better I think to just tell her. You didn't have to tell her she didn't appeal to you physically. You could have said you wanted to explore other options. I think she would have appreciated that.

soulfulempress · August 4th, 2008, 05:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by darkshadow4563

You didn't spare her heart. You left her wondering. It would have better I think to just tell her. You didn't have to tell her she didn't appeal to you physically. You could have said you wanted to explore other options. I think she would have appreciated that.

THANK YOU DARKSHADOW!!! This is what I was saying, just be a MAN and let me know you are not interested...you dont have to go into details like your too big, your not cute enough, your breath stinks, etc etc...just let a sista know that you want things to cease it shouldnt be hard if you dont have much feelings invested in the situation anyway.....THATS JUST SOME BITCHASSNESS TO ME!!

Jewels0479 · August 22nd, 2008, 12:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by serene

Its definately not u. I think its like u said, they probably weren't interested for whatever reason, and found it easier, not to tell, so they just don't call ya back.

I know the thread was directed toward guys, but i'm guilty of it too. there have been times if a guy calls me back, and i won't pick up the phone.

GUILTY as charged! I'll ignore a call in a minute. I agree that it's not the most mature or the fairest way to handle the situation but it's been my experience that a guy who thinks that he's made a connection won't take no for an answer. They want to know why you don't want to go out and then tell you solutions to the problem, what they or you can do to make the situation better. Telling them that you're just not interested in continuing the relationship isn't always simple. It's much easier for me to just avoid that whole situation especially if the guy isn't someone that I've shared a lot of time with. If we've dated for a few months, then I'll tell them how I feel but a couple of dates and I'm not feeling him, his calls get ignored. Is that so wrong?

The reasons that I've read are enlightening and ring true. But the bottom line is that if a person isn't calling and they aren't sick, dying or unwilfully detained, the reasons why don't really matter. All that you need to know is that they aren't and for whatever reason, now is not the time for the two of you, that time may never come and move on through your life. You never know, him not calling back may have been the best thing that he could have ever done for you.

Samoon · August 22nd, 2008, 01:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by soulfulempress

This question is aimed towards the brothers although I'm sure some men have gone through this as well.....

Whats up with the no call backs?!?!?! It is really infuriating for me....but the last few dates I have went on the guy just goes MIA...what is up with that... I mean you cant be man enough to tell me you are not interested instead you just dont answer your phone??? I mean it has left me feeling like I have done something wrong and I am left with questions that go unanswered..have any guys done this and if so....WHY???

"Broaden your dating pool as well."

Time waits for NO ONE and if a given individual does not deem you as "necessary?"

Keep that individual in your circumference....but keep it moving as well. KNOW that you are to be treated well. That's it.