How Do You Stop Loving Someone?

[RBG3]

I try that, problem is...somehow in some twist of fate I'll see her randomly in the city..or in a mall...it is ridiculous coincidence..oh and I left the country..and end up next to a store that is her name! Like things like that make it hard for me to forget her..I don't know..I've been pretty good lately, haven't seen her, and met this incredibly cute, beautiful girl I'm having a good time talking to..hopefully we can become better friends and I can finally fill the whole in my heart..not to sound like a softy haha, still revolutionary :)

[Ascension2012]

I think it was Chris Rock that said something like, "A man is only as faithful as his options".

I won't say if this is true or not for those of us still in a marriage/relationship, but it does ring true for getting over someone.

The more chances you can give yourself to dig into hobby, volunteer, meet new people, and ultimately meet new women.... the faster the recovery process. It'll still have to take it's course, but it moves along quicker.

[whistler]

Originally Posted by Proudbrothaman

Time heals all wounds!!!!

i agree with that. time has a way. :)

[StJohn1726]

Originally Posted by RBG3

Say you're in love with someone who doesn't return those feelings to you...how do you go about not loving this person anymore?

I'm not talking about lust, or liking, I mean genuine "I'll die for you" love. With no possibility of them loving you back, how do you stop yourself or move on?

<< not to be rude, I just rarely get to use these things

You don't completely stop loving them ever. You just move on with your life, because not moving on is not living. Even after you meet "the one" who thinks you're "the one," you'll probably still have loving feelings for this person, but we usually tend to focus our attention on the one we're with presently, and that helps us forget about others for longer periods. Just my $0.02 (might not be worth that much to you.)

Keep your head...

[BlackXpat]

You can turn it off,I made the mistake in loving a woman too much with not much effort in return.Never love someone if they are not putting in effort enough to match your love.Love in relationships are conditional.Dont waste time,i wasted five years to a slothful,decietful woman who i found out was whoreing on me anyway.

[elmb]

I am in your situation more than you know right now without putting my business out there.{{it's hard anyway..}} but I go through loving him and hating him for not doing right and you know what? I just go one day at a time. I pray in the morning, Lord, I just don't want to cry today. It's even harder with children involved.

Do try to get involved with other things, I joined different groups and put my pride aside and reached out to really good friends and times when I just can't take being alone, I reach out to them to come over and do the waiting to exhale thing.

[darkshadow4563]

Maybe once you fall in love with someone else. You know what I did? I made it impossible for me to be in the same places as he would. It wasn't because he didn't love me it was because it was an unproductive love. Love that would eventually cause me nothing but pain and I knew that. You have to occupy yourself with things outside his circle. It's difficult as heck but you do what you need to do to heal yourself.

87 more post.

[afrocentric]

Originally Posted by BlackXpat

You can turn it off,I made the mistake in loving a woman too much with not much effort in return.Never love someone if they are not putting in effort enough to match your love.Love in relationships are conditional.Dont waste time,i wasted five years to a slothful,decietful woman who i found out was whoreing on me anyway.

are you still mad about it?

[BlackXpat]

Originally Posted by afrocentric

are you still mad about it?

She put my life on the line,i was mad about that.The fact that she was so primiscuous with me in the middle caused me to hate her.I look at her as an object at one point in time,something that was tryin to destroy me cause she obviously hated herself.But that hate started eating at me and i had to forgive,but im not even physically attracted to her anymore.And she was not on my level like i for so many years was fooled into believing.Me finding out was actually liberating.So was i mad,yes.No longer.

[ole_boi]

when you wake up one day and realize that you have no hope and/or dreams anymore. when you give and give until you have nothing left and the person that is supposed to love you cannot be satisfied and invents more shyt to be pissed at you about. when the person you are married to is jealous of your relationship with your family. when you realize that you can be a better father without this person in your life. when you get physically ill @ the thought of your mate...that's when I knew I wasn't in love with my ex and that i had to go. i loved her for giving birth to our son and i loved some of our memories, but things change. to answer your question though, no-it's not hard at all.