I just want to tell you all a personal story of my online date that will crack you all up and give you a smile at my expense and at the same time maybe keep you from going through it.
I met a lady online using an online singles site much like this one ( I will keep the site private to protect the lady who is still there ).
I was all hung up on meeting a Spanish woman, you know the deal and was crusin the site looking at profiles when I saw a photo of a cute Latina woman located in NY and decided to mingle her. She mingles me back and we start chatting away that same day. Soon after a hour or so of chatting we decided to exchange numbers and start talking on the phone. We hit it off and the phone sessions started lasting for hours every night after work as we started learning all about one another (I thought).
I would always ask for more photos since she only had one little two inch one and I could only see sort of what she looked like (get photos people, lots of them). She always gave me some excuse about no scanner or she would like me to be surprised when and if we ever should meet (trick, don't fall for this line like I did).
She also would tell me every day about how some new guy was trying to hit on her and how hot they all thought she was and even had her kids gets on the phone and say it too (these men had to be blind in one eye and could see out of the other one).
After a few months of chatting and phone call every night for hours from TX to NY, we decided to meet for the first time in FL (what a mistake). I was so into her and thought she was the one and could not stop thinking about her everyday and night. We had everything in common and was loving life, family and the pursuit of happiness. I liked the picture of her and her sexy voice and was thinking what a match made in heaven. She was my dream lady sent to me by some miracle of the internet. She was into me and was thinking of relocating to be near me. I was on cloud nine. I even told all my online friends on the website, I posted little love notes on the message board and I even built a website as a full tribute to my dieing love since I was a web developer anyway. ( how so humiliating )
Well I decided (like a fool) to buy her a plane ticket to Florida since she did not have the funds and to meet her at my condo in Orlando. What a great time we would have on our first meeting and it would be a time to remember (you got that right). We would see Disney world and spend endless night in the pool and our room. I planned this so well that the planes would even connect at the same time and we could fly in together to FL.
So the day came after two months of waiting and we caught or planes and by some crazy deal, we meet at the airport to catch the same plane on to Florida.
Well let me tell you (you all can start laughing now) I did not recognize her! She was tore up from the floor up. She looked like she was 20 years older than the photo and was dressed like a 70's reject. I was floored, but did not want to hurt her feelings. She hugged me and kissed me in my mouth (like kissing your grandmother, eeewwww). She sit beside me on the next plane and tried to touch my MAN HOOD if you know what I mean. I had to act like I was a little shy to keep her from messing around since we have been talking about all types of stuff before we met (makes me sick now thinking about it).
I was in trouble and had 2 weeks of running to do, let alone the $2000 dollars I have already forked out for my dream date (FROM HELL) from tickets, car rental, Disney tickets and food.
We get to the place and I decide at the last minute to stay at my mom house to kill 2 birds with one stone and mom insisted anyway. My mom is retired and is married to some rich man and living in a large home in Melbourne, FL. about 25 miles from Orlando.
I insist on separate rooms to be a gentleman (to hide and cry in shame). She agrees and we finally turn in for the night. Some time during the night my grandmother date from hell decides she would surprise me with a scene from Deep Throat. She violates me while I was sleeping like a crazy kid with a new LOLI POP. I jump up from my sleep and kicked her in her mouth by accident and demand her to leave to her room that I don’t do stuff like that (not with a woman that needs a walker anyway).
Now I know you all are just killing yourselves laughing by now, because I would be if I was not crying.
Even though I was very disappointed we had a great time with my mom and her husband going to the zoo, casinos and area shopping. I never went to Disney world and have not gone since. Mom kept use busy doing all kinds of things to keep me sane and still a 44 year old reborn virgin. By the way, my mom was laughing every time she saw me looking her way and the DATE FROM HELL wasn’t looking at me or her (that was so cold) and she even called my three brothers to tell them the story too so all of my home town new about it with in the side of a week.
The lady was nice though, but I decided I had to end this thing early since the trip would end back at my home in TX. You see the ticket I got her was not a round trip one and finished back in TX with me so she could see FL and TX in one trip. (How stupid could I be?)
After the FL thing and all the running away from a woman that was bald on top, looked older then my mom, shaped like Mrs. Potato Head and had boobs that she had to roll up be for sticking into her bra, she was coming home with me to TX. (Oh my GOD!)
When we got to TX, I let her sleep in my bedroom as a gentleman and slept out in the living room on the coach. I just worked like crazy at web design and acted like I was just too busy for a woman at the moment. I got her a one-way ticket back to NY and lied that I had to leave for Boston on business to not hurt her feelings even though she lied on her profile. She had to be over 60 years old and claiming to be 35 (some body needs a lie detector test).
After all that, we still are friends, but from 1700 miles away and she has no idea that I had a terrible time. She has found someone nice and I think getting married that last I heard from her.
The moral to this story is: Look before you leap or Get more pictures before you buy the plane ticket and also just because you like the person on the inside, does NOT mean that you can deal with the looks on the outside.
Sad but true, you need to have a little physical attraction to go with that great person inside that LIED ABOUT WHAT SHE LOOKED LIKE! (smile)
Rules to follow:
1- GET MORE PICTURES and have the date from the film and sized larger then 2 inches
2- Don't pay for a big date with out more proof of what you’re getting
3- Meet for a short time first and then plan a long one
4- Put and alarm on you bedroom door to keep ugly, old, hairless, sex starved, no shaped, droopy boobed, hair weaved, grandmothers that think they are all that from trying to rape you in the night!
True story that just happened to me over Thanksgiving weekend year 2003 and this is why I need many pictures and live web cam before I will ever go on a date again.
From all this I started my own Dating system called Heaven Helpers and it is located at
Heaven Helpers Social Networking and everyone is welcome, but please use REAL pictures of yourself and of the same year atleast.
The Doctor
Darnell's World - Content pro. web developer,
Business In The Black - Content Menu
Brotha Darnell,that's your problem. Most of time, regardless of venue, you will attract what you project. And in this situation, you projected desperation for a preconceived notion of beauty that was promoted by societal factors. Some forget the genetic complexity of the Black American race with: different natural hues in complexion, different natural hues in eye color, different natural hues in hair color and various kinds of hair textures.
lol
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