Another relationship inquiry! - AfroChat - African American

needtoknow · January 18th, 2007, 08:10 PM

:) Hello, again! I have another thoughtful question. Why is it that a lot of black men seem to go to white women for love instead of black ones, stating that their reason is that we talk too much and do not allow them to be strong, black men? I know for myself that I have always known that silence is golden, and being a listener is better than talking all the time. I know how to help a black realize his full potential because my father taught me well that the man is the provider and ruler. What is your take on this? And, I have already heard that this is a new day, and women have to be as strong as men, but there is such a thing as female strength of love. We should be able to see in the man the type of loving that he needs, not maternal, but womanly. Tell me your thoughts, both men and women, please!

jamesfrmphilly · January 18th, 2007, 08:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by needtoknow

:) Hello, again! I have another thoughtful question. Why is it that a lot of black men seem to go to white women for love instead of black ones, stating that their reason is that we talk too much and do not allow them to be strong, black men? I know for myself that I have always known that silence is golden, and being a listener is better than talking all the time. I know how to help a black realize his full potential because my father taught me well that the man is the provider and ruler. What is your take on this? And, I have already heard that this is a new day, and women have to be as strong as men, but there is such a thing as female strength of love. We should be able to see in the man the type of loving that he needs, not maternal, but womanly. Tell me your thoughts, both men and women, please!

who are you, what are you and what is your background?

needtoknow · January 18th, 2007, 08:49 PM

I am a real old school black woman, from NY, but lived and raised my children in the south. What are you asking?

jamesfrmphilly · January 18th, 2007, 08:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by needtoknow

What are you asking?

i like to know who i am talking to, don't you?

no woman can prevent a man from being a man.
most black men are with black woman.
so what are you really saying?

needtoknow · January 18th, 2007, 09:00 PM

What about all of the men that are with white women? And, when asked why, they say it is because black women run them off with our bossy behavior without allowing them to realize their true potential. That is not true, as far as I am concerned, but I wanted to hear from others to see what their take was on it. That's all!

robbboy2003 · January 18th, 2007, 09:09 PM

Again, James is on point here. Most black men are with sista's. If both women and men choose wiser,there would be a whole lot less pain.

We have to be careful about making too sweeping statements. There is just as many folks trying to do things the right way,as the alternative.

Peace!

needtoknow · January 18th, 2007, 09:14 PM

Okay, maybe you are right. But, for some reason, lately, several women who happen to be black are saying more that they have to resort to looking at other races of men for a relationship since most black men are either with white women, have switched to being attracted to other men, or already married. It just seems different in a lot of ways regarding trying to meet and fall in love with a black man today. Any suggestions?

RaInEdomThoughtz · January 18th, 2007, 10:30 PM

A lot of women complain about the shortage of good black men, I believe that they should analyze where/what theyre looking for/in them.

Maybe Im biased because have and come from a family of good black men.

shankems2000 · January 18th, 2007, 10:45 PM

Now, this isn't my personal opinion but the stereotype even among some black men is that black women are loud, obnoxious, yadda, yadda, yadda, they try to take the lead in everything giving the man trouble in the relationship. The opposite stereotype is said of white and other races of women, hence, these black men chase after them instead. Hope that helped.

jamesfrmphilly · January 19th, 2007, 12:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by needtoknow

Okay, maybe you are right. But, for some reason, lately, several women who happen to be black are saying more that they have to resort to looking at other races of men for a relationship since most black men are either with white women, have switched to being attracted to other men, or already married. It just seems different in a lot of ways regarding trying to meet and fall in love with a black man today. Any suggestions?

are you trying to meet and fall in love with a black man?