Improve or not?

[Babydoll]

The only thing I think I will improve on is the communication with my kids.

MY mother was not a great communicator. A number of subjects were taboo in our house, so we learned a lot from friends. That won't happen in my house.

My mom was a teenaged mother, so she did the best she could with what the resources she had. I turned out ok, but Iknow that so much got by her and my kid won't be able to get over so easily.

[Blak]

Originally Posted by Babydoll

The only thing I think I will improve on is the communication with my kids.

MY mother was not a great communicator. A number of subjects were taboo in our house, so we learned a lot from friends. That won't happen in my house.

My mom was a teenaged mother, so she did the best she could with what the resources she had. I turned out ok, but Iknow that so much got by her and my kid won't be able to get over so easily.

I have to seriously improve communication myself. That was always a big issue and it made me really learn to keep things to myself growing up. I need to undo that so that I dont shut my own family out, and so that my kids feel they can come to me....also, so that they dont emmulate that trait in me.

[elmb]

Well.....My aunt who raised me definitely did a better job because my grandmother and grandfather were very old school, very limited education so therefore their major concern was the welfare of the children. My aunt did an good job communicating with me but she was only there half of my life so I had to regroup from alot of things. I do consider myself a better parent because I have been consistently been a part of my children's life. Most importantly, I keep in mind that they are the most important accomplishments in my life and there are no perfect parents and no perfect children. It's a day to day journey that we share daily where hopefully I'm imparting wisdom that will one day be passed on to their children. I just hope I'm here to see that part.

[Pdble]

Originally Posted by elmb

I do consider myself a better parent because I have been consistently been a part of my children's life. Most importantly, I keep in mind that they are the most important accomplishments in my life and there are no perfect parents and no perfect children. It's a day to day journey that we share daily where hopefully I'm imparting wisdom that will one day be passed on to their children. I just hope I'm here to see that part.

Only because I know you so well, will I comment on how proud I am of the mother you have become. Keep an eye on that little one though :D :tongue:

It's hard to say what kind of parent I will be, but I look forward to the challenge. I won't say that It will be an improvement, but definitely different. Like another sistah stated, there was never a line of open communication or a show of affection in my home growing up. It's not until my adulthood that I realize why. Not to make a short story any longer than it needs to be, but I see where the changes will be made in the children God bless me with.

[elmb]

Hey Pdble,

It's funny that I just decided to come back online right behind you. I have told you in the past but you are and always have been such a special part of me and my boys' lives.

Not to take the thread off course, but this is just an example on how 2 lives that were so dysfunctional came together and brought so much joy and love to eachother. It's not so much being a better parent than your own, it's always wanting your child to have better. You are willing to do whatever you need to do to get them on their course of life. God will send you what you need when you need it. God sent me Pdble ?? years ago in Juniior High School and she has been a major part of my village every since.

[JamieC]

My parents did a pretty good job with us as well. We had a two parent household and we were a little more fortunate than the others kids in our neighborhood.

But so far so good with my kiddos! (Thank God).. because when your'e dealing with the personalities of an 8, 15, and 16 year old. You gotta wear a different hat every day.

[Ren6879]

I dont know much about my parents raising me being that i was in foster care from the age of 7.... I learned a lot though I was moved to at least 5 different homes with my brothers and sisters and I grew up at a very young age ... i fought in court to have my family together at the age of 12 ... i wrote letters to our representatives about how bad our schools were before I left elementary school.... i stole to feed my family ... and was very quick to put my foot up into the rear of anyone who said differently ....i was adamant about family and still am ... now the father of 2 i do all of the things with my children that wasnt done for me .... I am a big influence on thier lives and love the time I spend with them .... i will and am definitely improving on parenting skills .... and right now i am taking care of my mom though she didnt take care of me ....

[Blak]

Ren: That is quite a story you got there. You are obviously doing a great job with your family and still care enough to constantly improve.....those are some lucky children!!! :)


I see overall 75% of us care enough to make improvements....that is better than I expected. Thanks to anyone who participated in the poll :D

Blak

[000HONEY]

Just like with everything else, there is always room for improvement

[msqueen]

Well, times are different. More things to worry about but my main goal as a parent is to be there for my children. I feel like my parents were not too concerned about how we felt about things and we never asked questions.

I just believe in spending time with your children and showing and teaching them a way of life. So, I guess I would go about parenting somewhat differently. But, I have to understand that my husband was raised a certain way too so, I just hope the positive relationship with my husband wears off on our children.