Does No Father Really Make A Difference?

[Sess20]

Originally Posted by Mr.Bronx

The father is the rock of the family. God says so. It's a little late in the game for the ladies that don't know by now.

Without the father, the family is a ship without a sail and a compass, and so there is no tellin' where the ship is headin, or when it will dock.

Single Mom's my hats off to ya, but don't think your accomplishments comes close to replacing or subbin' for a real man....a father.

I find this very hard to believe

I Know Sess, Its Just Based On A Bunch Of Perpetrated American And Christian Stereotypes.

[RealTalk3000]

every child need its father, dont get it twisted. Society try to make it seem as if that doesnt matter but it does,every child need someone whos strong in their lives.A mother can do so much for their kids but its up to the man to mold them into what they become later in their lives.A father is very important in a kids life, he can take alot of load off the mother while she does shopping and keeping the houese clean etc... so yes a father is important in a kids life no matter its a boy or girl

[MilitantWombMan]

Yes it does,my dad died 4 years ago,and i have 3 younger brothers,and a sister..and after he passed..their behavior changed alot..my father was pretty much the disciplinarian...all the stuff that i see was not going on when my daddy was here. It also just feels so empty here. I would go into bigger detail,however i aint tryna put it all out there, but the change is quite obvious.
But yes fathers play a big role,and yes there is a difference whether we believe it or not!

[lizaa]

Teaching and loving is key..all children needs a GOOD father-of course when one becomes a parent they are new to the game of parenting so advice from their elders-the wise elders would be helpful..a child's mind is so precious and vunerable what they see and hear..children need both parents in their lives.fathers are the head of the household-if that sounds ol skool-oh well..both parents should be in agreement when raising their child and this should be done before they get to gether to have one.

[MilitantWombMan]

Since my dad died, i have been the childcare provider,the cook,the one who has had to schedule my life around their school hours..trying to go to college..woo

[therealisticlady]

Originally Posted by NappilyMe

Since my dad died, i have been the childcare provider,the cook,the one who has had to schedule my life around their school hours..trying to go to college..woo

NappilyMe, I am sorry that you have had it so hard since your father died.

I too lost my father only at a much younger age. He died when I was 9. I see so many things that have happened in my life that might not have happened had that first man that I loved been here while I was growing up. After all fathers are the first men that girls fall in love with and tend to affect all future relationships.

Hell Yes Fathers are important!

[MilitantWombMan]

Originally Posted by therealisticlady

NappilyMe, I am sorry that you have had it so hard since your father died.

I too lost my father only at a much younger age. He died when I was 9. I see so many things that have happened in my life that might not have happened had that first man that I loved been here while I was growing up. After all fathers are the first men that girls fall in love with and tend to affect all future relationships.

Hell Yes Fathers are important!

Right, so much you have to learn on your own,and relationships are seriously affected..it's actually hard for me to have one now.

Good father figures are important not neccessarily biological fathers. It takes a village to raise a child. And all I originallay said is that there is to much precedence made to not having the biological father around and teaching the child. Teaching the child what???? Too many people want the father around no matter what kind of person the father is. If he is there to just help with the shopping or something like that then thats o.k. LOL. But be careful because its usually more to it than that.

[bluesky]

[quote=Rammcsnake] Too many people want the father around no matter what kind of person the father is. [quote]

So you think a father should be denied bonding with his child because he sells drugs, in and out of jail, consumes alcohol, listens to gangsta rap, ect. I'd rather have a father who does those thinks yet takes care of me and one that doesn't do anything at all. Who's to say that one day this man turns his life around stops selling drugs, stays out of jail, becomes a recovering alcoholic, start listening to gospel music---

Wait too many people want the mother around on matter what kind of person the mother is--Yes this hold absolutely true in the situation of my best friend. I've said before my best friend's mother was on crack, consumed alcohol, in and out of jail/prison, and even prostituted throughout our childhood and early 20's. She was "adopted" by my family but my parents never once denied her mother access to seeing her/spending time with her/or coming over when she wasn't high. My mother felt that it allowed my best friend to have interaction and a bond with her mother because after she is her mother. Who's to say when someone decides to clean up and get right?

My best friend's mother has been a recovering addict for 5 years now clean and sober. Although her mother wasn't there for everything and wasn't living the "right" life she was involved in some of her childhood memories...ex: bought her prom dress, came to her graduation (high school and college), bought us Easter baskets, --the list goes on. My best friend and I talk about her life growing up she thinks it was better than my parents allowed her mom to "step in and out her life" because now that her mom is clean. They have a better relationship. They are able to discuss the goods, bads, and uglys. She doesn't feel resentment as she might have if her mom tried to step in without ever being involved and tried to explain "why she wasn't there". For her mother being there 1/4th the time was better than her mother not being there at all. Nothing worse than trying to tell a adult child what to do or how to live when you were not involved in there childhood. .

Even if a father is a part time there are ways--you can supervise the visits if you feel the father is going to influence his child negatively, meet at McDonald's or a nice resturant for lunch, meet him at a park, . Even if he's in jail...most will preach to their children that they don't want to be there even if they themselves continue to go in and out.... ect...So for me your theory don't hold water.