Worried about my eldest son

[Juice.]

Originally Posted by RealTalk3000

I'm just saying some sistas can be cruel to brothas that arent thugs, drug dealers, and future jail mates. Im saying her son could be a good guy and i see alot of sistas treat them guys wrong, then when a chick of another race gives him attention then his first instinct is to speak back he will show more interest because she didnt judge him or say anything wrong about him. The problem with black women is they give the wrong men ATTENTION,then they wonder why brothas are interested in white girls. Not saying this is an excuse but a face.Alot of these black boys arent taught to love themselves and when sistas belittle them during school and other ways,his second priority is white girls. No man in his right mind will sit and wait until a sista comes along and finally decide she wants to be with him then it will be too late, people gotta move on and let folks get with who they like

I would agree that WOMEN, in general, have a tendency to choose men who display the 'treat women like ****' qualities you highlight. But it isn't a trait attributable to Black women only. Have you ever spoken to a white man about white women? They'll tell you the same thing in different words. They'll use the word "jerk" in substitution of "thug" and "nice guy" in place of "good man".

Latin and white women are no different. They go for the type of dudes who end up treating them badly. That is the truth that most women refuse to acknowledge.

That said, women are not attracted to that ahzhole behavior necessarily; they're attracted to what the bad behavior represents but doesn't say. They're attracted to the maturity that seems to exist behind the veneer of that bad behavior. They're attracted to the strength, the solidarity, the 'do what you're gonna do whatever' mentality that bad behavior is demonstrative of - and other things. That being said, it is only obvious that you can be a strong Black man and portray those exact same qualities.

When I say a 'strong Black man', I don't mean '*****' or 'compliment giver' or 'weak bastard'; because then, those qualities women are generally attracted to, won't be there. When I say 'strong Black man, I mean a man who respects those around him who deserve respect, for he understands that in respecting others, he'll receive respect of equal proportion. He understands that a vagina is not just pleasure, it means too much to be disrespected. He knows the woman he respects deserves that respect, because a woman like her, made him and every other man that walks the earth.

[Jewels0479]

I hear what she is saying also but the same can be said about black men. I have seem plenty of black men go for women who are less than noble representations of our race because they have the right image, or fit the norm of what we think of as sexy when any fool can see that the woman is about nothing more than getting what she can get from a man who is smitten by these "qualities". All the while, the "good black woman" is overlooked.

I've always been into black men, it was a given for me and while I may see a handsome man of another race, dating one has never been an option. As with anything that we take for granted, a point came when I revisited this line of thinking and asked if I was limiting my options by choosing to date only black men, especially when I see so many people who are dating interracially around me and have been encouraged to try "something new". After careful consideration, I came to the conclusion that I could NEVER date any man other than a black man for, among other things, the following reasons:

1) I LOVE black PEOPLE.
2) There is a certain unspoken connection that we share that just doesn't exist in my interactions with other races. We come from the same place and no explanation is needed for many things that I would have to try and get a man of another race to understand and respect about me.
3)I wouldn't be able to look a black man in the face and expect him to respect me when I am on the arm of a man of another race.
4) I LOVE BLACK MEN!

With that said, I have commited myself to the loving the black race as a whole and fundamental to that love is choosing a black mate. Some people think that they are selling themselves short or limiting themselves by dating only black men/women because mating with other races will give them more of an advantage in society. I think that they are selling our entire race short by doing this. Whatever I face in this life, I will face it with a black man by my side regardless of anything else.