To Celebrate or Not to Celebrate

I heard something that puzzled me today. Someone I know has a baby who is turning a year old soon. I wondered what they were going to do for the baby's first birthday and the response I received was that in their family they don't give really small children birthday parties or anything because they won't remember it when they grow up. WTF????? I was momentarily stunned and started to debate what I think is the rediculousness of the reason for not celebrating when I decided to keep my mouth shut because who am I to tell someone their family is wrong for basically having this "rule".

But it's kind of bugged me all day. Now I can understand not having a party if there is no money to spare. Celebrating anything is a luxury so this reason I can understand. But because the kid won't remember it?? That just sounds dumb to me, I'm sorry. Granted, who remembers their first, second, maybe even 3rd birthdays? Most people don't. But what about celebrating for the people who will remember? How about you as the parent celebrating that your child actually made it to see their first birthday when so many children do not?? I guess I just think about things like this differently than some people, and in the end that's okay cuz whatever works for them effects them, not me. But I can't help having a "WTF" moment about this.

Am I alone or do ya'll think this is a little nutsy????

[Reesie]

I agree with you Ran Ran. I celebrated my son's 1st birthday with a cake, balloons, gifts and food. It was small but he loved it. Even though he doesn't remember it now, he did back then. The fact that the experience stayed within his memory for as long as it did is good enough for me. Parents need to realize that each and every experience, especially the good ones, are good for total well-being and development for their children. It is great for brain development as well. Celebrating those birthdays would make any child feel extra special. Man, not celebrating that child's birthday?? To each his/her own, but I will definitely whip up a cake in no time for my youngans no matter how small they are.

[LadyNoir]

I have one child and I had a birthday party for him at age 1. Whether he remembered it or not doesn't matter, but I do remember that he had a glorious time, and so did the children who attended his first party.

I've gotten to the age where I can remember things that happened when I was the age of 2 years or less, faster than I can sometimes remember where I left my car keys just a few minutes ago, so who's to say whether the child will remember? :confused:

[saraphen]

When my kids turned one, we had cake and ice cream for baby and the immediate family.

I have seen some people go really overboard with the first birthday celebration. They rent a hall, have a caterer, invite 100 of their closest friends, and expect 100 gifts for the baby.

RanRan, maybe your friend has seen some of those over-the-top celebrations and just decided to stay home quietly.

[Corals]

Most of the time these parties that are supposed given for the 1-year old, does not even involved the 1-year old. The child is usually fast asleep while the party goes on into the wee hours of the morning. Not only that, you sometimes get some of the guest arriving after midnight, and I'm sure it is not to wish the child Happy Birthday. :whistling

Originally Posted by saraphen

RanRan, maybe your friend has seen some of those over-the-top celebrations and just decided to stay home quietly.

Naw. From what I was told this has been something their family has been doing since at least the 70s and I know the over the top celebrations are a little more common now but I doubt we was into that type of thing back in the day.

Originally Posted by Corals

Most of the time these parties that are supposed given for the 1-year old, does not even involved the 1-year old. The child is usually fast asleep while the party goes on into the wee hours of the morning. Not only that, you sometimes get some of the guest arriving after midnight, and I'm sure it is not to wish the child Happy Birthday. :whistling

Hey Corals, you say that like it's a bad thing.:) Honestly that's the way I think it should be. Give the kids the afternoon and evening to enjoy themselves. By 10pm it's time for the afterset cuz anyone who has been around multiple numbers of children having fun knows that after this experience grown folks need some grown folks time, know what I'm sayin?? And anyway, the way I've heard some mothers talk about it the child's birthday is as much her day as it is the kid's considering what she went through to get the baby here! Might as well turn it into a 2 for one party.

[Reesie]

I just thought of something...maybe it is a matter of their religious beliefs. I know that Jehova's Witnesses don't celebrate birthdays. I don't know if it's all of them or some. Maybe the family follows that doctrine and didn't want to get into all of that and just gave the reason they gave?

[RaInEdomThoughtz]

I had 1st year birthday parties for both of my children, but I think other than the photo's of the party the child wont remember any of it. I think the parties are more for the parents than the child.

Originally Posted by Reesie

I just thought of something...maybe it is a matter of their religious beliefs. I know that Jehova's Witnesses don't celebrate birthdays. I don't know if it's all of them or some. Maybe the family follows that doctrine and didn't want to get into all of that and just gave the reason they gave?

Nope that ain't it. They do birthday parties later on, just not for the really small kids. Witnesses don't celebrate at all.

[cardiyac]

Yeah, that's wack son. Er'body live they own life though...so it's all good. I'm the type of person that ANY opportunity to celebrate ANYTHING in this fvcked up, short life we live is cause to celebrate. And besides, that's part of those family-making memories of "the good ol' days" when you're growing up so you can't deprive a child of that.