Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackXpat
You cant find any non divorced men?
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*Update, we are no longer together*
It's not that I can't find a non-divorced or single man but I've been in my career for 10 years now. I'm a little bit more settled than most men my age and I'm not looking for someone who is still trying to find themselves (Ironic I know) or someone who lives at home or is still talking about what they want to be when they grow up instead of being that.
I may piss some off, but honestly how many black men 30 years of age are stable in their own place, no kids, smart, good credit, are still into black women, is mature, has a personality, and isn't playing mind games? Please tell me because I don't have a clue
I have always dated and been attracted to older men and no I'm looking for a father figure, my relationship with my father is fine. I'm not the independant black woman who rants and rave about not needing a man because I know that all the things I can do for myself I still want a companion to grow with. I have never told a man "I don't need you". I am very much like the Jill Scott song "I need you". But I always hear It's not you it's me, you're gonna make some man a good wife some day, I don't deserve to have you, etc and the problem really could be me and who I attract. Knowing this man for sometime I would have never thought he'd be as messed up as he was.... You'd think a 40 year old man wouldn't be playing games and being selfish. He really made it seem like we had a future together. When I was the one saying let this go, he was always the one saying he's in this for the long haul... He made me believe that bullshit and when the pressure was on his *** bailed.
The older and longer I stay single I get I feel like most men will see me as what I call the "virgin" concept. The concept sounds nice when you're young to get one but the older you get and if she has no children, never been married, great career, but no man then something has to be wrong with her and no one is willing to take the chance because they don't want to "teach" you new things nor do they have the patience... Most men today have children or are divorced. So they will always see me and a little naive because they think they've been there and done that which I think is B.S. I just happened to be smart enough to not have gone down that road so atleast give me some props for not having children out of wedlock or marrying someone I didn't love or got married just for the sake of saying that I was because everyone around me is married.