[JABOOM]

A look followed with a rush of emotion that calls for a fight or flight response

I've been here before eye to eye with a woman I felt this way for in the past and each time it all ended in anger needing to scream F's, S's and sometimes B's

Really all the time I wanted to cry fall to my knees and ask what happened to what was so real

Now that we are here that feeling that was for me a prelude to rage and pain, I only want to turn away look down but I'm locked into your eyes.

A racing heart added to sweaty palms, maddening torture knowing I can't fight this feeling this emotion that through the years of heart break and bad judgment and its destructive nature if it doesn't go our way or ours.

I have learned to distrust and reject it completely, but right now sitting in front of you fighting with a coin just to hide my shaking hands that want to reach for yours.

There are some words burning in my mouth that want to jump forth but I swallow them

Olive oil wants to fly from my life and cook us in what these words rhyme with WHAT they really mean.

The tension in me is rising. My head hurts. My nose is burning and running and you made my fever worst by rubbing my forehead with loving concern

GOD!!!! I can ask what has she done to me but I already know.

Always on my mind my poetry if you can call these love notes that any more has changed to reflect my feelings for you

Blood pressure must be high with the speed my heart is pumping

Sudden illness that vanish when I see speak hug love and share my world with you

WHAT IS GOING ON WITH ME!!!??

Now you’re looking at me deep into my eyes you gaze with intrigue and loving wonder

I know if I say what it is I plan to say it can mean so much more than just 3 words

They are almost a marriage proposal not to be said unless you understand the consequences of your actions

Not to be thrown around like *Let me touch you there* Lets go out tonight *Dance with me*

But to be used with caution with an understanding and sure heart knowing that what you say is………………….what you mean

I can’t fight the words any more they’re pushing there way through my soar throat coating it with healing power……..don’t ask me how

I --- my voice weak cracking with fear and apprehension

I --- my eyes dart left and right trying to avoid your eyes

I --- *damn it* the words want to come but worry holds me back beating me all the way

You know what’s on the tip of my tongue you smile *blushing* understand me as always knowing my attentions be for I can put the out to you
To the day you save it with a pause a minimal moment momentarily moving closer to me with a stutter you beat me to the punch as I open my mouth this time brave bold doing something most men would never do……first

“I Love You” you say shocked fall back in your seat smiling

“Yeah I know it’s crazy but I was wanting to tell you this for awhile but I was…

With a giggle….. But I was scared you didn’t love me

Forgetting myself and my fear for that moment I tell you how absurd you have to be to think I don’t love you……….

I pause realizing what just flew from my mouth

Too late now I repeat myself actually saying what I planned to say from the jump

I love you…….

No longer worried of what is yet to come the storm the clouds and the rain can come for all I care because **** IT I LOVE YOU!!!

I reach for you hand and we walk away……….to our future

……together

JABOOM