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Originally Posted by toylin
I am divorced. My son just turned 1 a couple of months ago. I'm sure that he's a little confused on why he sees one parent or the other, but never at the same time. My ex and I are trying to keep a civil, if not friendly, relationship. Honestly, there aren't too many bad feelings between us; we just get along much better when we don't live together, and are not in a romantic relationship. My ex takes a very active role in our son'slife, which I'm very greatful for. But perhaps it is better for us to get along and be apart than to be together and argue all the time. We have both agreed to always be open with our son as he grows up. Hopefully, we will be able to teach him that whatever happened between us, it is not his fault.
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Toylin, I think your point of view is the other 'necessary' part of the coin. If you can't get along, it is better to 'divorce' and not stay in an unhappy relationship. Some children of divorce get that. My sister's divorced and my niece (her daughter) is delighted in that she says, 'she doesn't have to hear and see all the fussing and fighting.' The un-happiness left now that they are apart and she still gets to be with both parents according to the 'divorce decree'. He gets every other weekend or something like that. Anyway, my niece says she 'likes it better that way, so showing God can cause children to adjust to whatever environment they are in.
After all, there are millions of children who wish their parents would divorce because of the dysfunction of the home environment. In other words, a lot of damage goes on to the psyche' of children who have been reared in 2 family homes. The best all can hope for is that whatever decision they make the children will adjust to it, and in the long run be alright.